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Monday, April 29, 2013

Still the same dumb blonde....

It's funny how you change as you get older, but somehow some things never change.

Last night I was talking with my hubby before we fell asleep.

He said to me, "You know... when you first meet people, you act completely different to them than you do when people get to know you better."

me: "Oh yeah? Like how?"  (I'm thinking, I seem more professional, or maybe more formal. In high school I definitely came across as very ditzy and even shallow, which I wasn't!  I've definitely tried harder to come across more cool, calm and collected- more formal over the years. Ya, more formal, with a touch of classy educated socialite mixed in. I'm sure that's it.)

him: "Well... now don't take this the wrong way...." (which of course means, take this the wrong way!) "But... well, you kind of come across as.... ditzy."

me: "What?! No I don't! I try very hard not to be ditzy!" (even though, I must admit, I am a bit ditzy, but not dumb ditzy, SMART ditzy.)

him: "Well... maybe ditzy isn't the right word. More like.... shallow."

me: "What?!"

him: "Well... once they get to know you better people know you aren't shallow. It's just... your first impression... that's all."

me: "Mmmmm Hmmm.... so.... shallow.... huh? And ditzy."

Well... so much for working to change for 20 years!

Saturday, April 20, 2013

It's a rainy day...

It is raining and raining and raining outside today. Rain on a Saturday is kind of bitter-sweet. I love being able to go outside on Saturdays and get a lot of yard work done this time of year, but with the rain I am forced to be inside. However, I've turned on some Nat King Cole and various similar singers, I've got dinner cooking in the crock pot, I worked out hard on the treadmill, and I am now going to finish preparing my relief society lesson.

The lesson is about bettering ourselves day by day. It really rings with me right now as I am trying to better myself physically. I made a goal a month ago (yes, you read that right. An actual goal! I know- miracles do happen!) to get myself into better shape physically. I wanted to have more control over what goes into my body, and what I do with my body-  namely exercise and strength conditioning.

It is definitely a daily journey! Some days I feel invigorated and ready to work out hard. I have the emotional strength to say- it doesn't matter how much you can't do right now, what matters is what you CAN do. Other days I put it off and put it off and put it off until I say, If I dont' go work out before my head hits the pillow I am going to feel so much worse about myself and it's going to be that much harder tomorrow. So I force myself to exercise. And most days I feel so much better and it gets easier and then I'm doing that hard workout I didn't think I could do.

I guess it's that way with life in general. Some things are easy. For me not drinking alcohol or smoking is easy. Not killing people is generally not hard for me. (Spouse and kid excluded, of course!) I don't struggle with some of the difficult things others struggle with. But, the things I do struggle with are definitely hard for ME. I guess that's why we're not supposed to judge others; their struggles are their own; mine are my own. Hmmm.... I think I get it now!

Some days it is easy to work on bettering myself. I work on not gossiping, or not yelling at my kid, or keeping my house clean and organized. But there are those days when I mess up. I talk negatively about someone I don't truly know or understand (because their struggles are their own... I got it.). Or I lose my patience with my son. Then I feel horrible about myself and feel like I'll never "get it".

But there is always a next day where I get to try all over again. It's a clean slate. If I skipped my workout one day, there's always the next day to pick it up again. If I mess up with something one day, I can always try again the next. I love repentance!

So, on this rainy Saturday as I put off finishing my relief society lesson even longer by typing this blog post, I am reminded that I can try harder. And once you've done a good job one day, it betters you. You get stronger. I can run further today than I could a month ago because I keep trying every day. I get better. And that's what the whole point is, right?

Friday, April 12, 2013

It's a deadly job, but someone's gotta do it...

Stay At Home Mom: (Noun, Action Verb) A women who puts herself in harm's way on a daily basis to provide for her family and take care of her home.

Today's mishaps:

*Dropped heavy mixing blade on my foot. It hurt!

*Spilled hot melted wax all over myself and the living room floor and book case, and video camera.

*Burned thumb on cookie sheet while taking it out of the oven.

*Stabbed myself in the eye with my toothbrush while brushing my teeth.

*Sucked up the lace of my shoe while vacuuming.

*Fell over while trying to free my lace from the vacuum.

*Vacuum fell onto me after I fell over trying to free my lace from the vacuum.

*Fell over while reaching for something behind me in my sewing room.

*Smashed finger under sewing machine foot. Ouch!

*Car door slammed closed on my ankle. &%$@/!

All of this in just ONE day.... I think I'd better wrap myself in bubble wrap and stay in bed!