Watch Out, Folks! She's About To Blow!

I have come to the sad conclusion that I am a grouchy hag! I think the stress of marriage and motherhood are to blame. Don't misunderstand me, I actually LOVE being married to my sweet hubby, and wouldn't trade my little buddy for anything in the world! But those of you in my same situation know that throwing a husband and a child into the mix creates... well.... more stress.

I remember in high school, I was known as the spunky girl- always happy and cheerful, bubbling over with giddiness. (Yes, I was also extremely boy crazy, that might have had something to do with it... maybe.) A kid in my class came up to me once and said, "Erin.... Why are you always so damn happy?" I will never forget the dry, slightly perturbed tone in his voice when he said it. But it made me proud that I could be so annoyingly happy.

College was not much different, really. Yes, I was still boy crazy, a disorder that didn't really correct itself until I donned the wedding dress and ate the piece of cake from my new hubby's hand.( Which he so lovingly did NOT smash into my face- the first right decision he made in our married life.) College was carefree- except for finals and vocal juries (Ach! That stomach pain again!) But how was I to know that the stresses they would bring were virtual Marshmallow Peeps compared with the stresses of "real" adulthood?

I went from a life of me, me, me, me, me... what do I want for dinner tonight? What movie will I see tonight? Do I want to sleep in today.... yes I do, so I will! To, what will my hubby and son eat, what movie will not drive hubby from the room rolling his eyes and making fake gagging noises, do I want to sleep in today because I was up all night with a sick child... yes I do, but I can't because I have to get up and take care of everybody else!!!!! I run errands now to pick up someone else's prescriptions, someone else's soccer gear, someone else's school uniform. You get the idea. It's usually 3:00 pm before I actually run a comb through my hair and eat breakfast!

I realized I must complain a lot last night when my son informed me he had to go lie down because he had a headache. Kids don't get headaches! I realized that line came directly from my mouth to his ears! I try not to complain, really I do. I actually like to serve my family, usually! It makes me happy to make their favorite meals. I love when we all snuggle together on the couch and watch some silly old swashbuckling movie because Dad likes action, Son needs a movie with nothing too scarey, Mom needs a few hours to sit and vegge.

I also realized that I seem like I have little to no patience for anything anymore. Actually, I have more patience than a hospital! (get it? a play on words? Oh, never mind, I can't wait around all day for you to get my stupid jokes!) I have developed more patience and long suffering because I am a wife and mother. I haven't off'd my family in a fit of rage have I? See, iron patience! But, with patience comes side effects- headaches, slight twiches, sudden bursts of freaking out followed by uncontrolled sobbing followed by half a pint of Ben and Jerry's followed by much apologizing and hugs.

I don't think I'm really that much different from other women in my situation, really. I think we women have developed a way to put on a happy face so we can power through it all and hope for the rainbow at the end. I'd settle for a dishwasher or a large closet at the end! I actually long for the day when someone says "Erin, why are you always so *&%$ happy?" Probably when I'm old and senile. I am beginning to think that senility is nature's way of rewarding you for all your patience!

It's Not Easy Being Green

It seems that everywhere you look people are saying how they are "Going Green". I thought it meant something similar to what happened to me the 9 months I was pregnant, but aparently it is a good thing. "Going Green" means doing things that are environmentally conscious. I think much of it stems from people's fear that greenhouse gas emissions are destroying the Earth's atmosphere, or some silly thing like that. They drive cars that burn corn oil, use solar panels to heat their ovens, even wear clothing made from bamboo! Many of these things seem a little far-fetched to me, actually. I don't believe the Earth's atmosphere is disintigrating, or that we can do anything about it if it is.

However, I do worry about overflowing landfills and daily human waste. I don't like to see those plastic grocery bags swirling down dusty streets, like modern-day tumbleweeds. So, I was happy to find that I am already "going green" in many areas when I read an article in the "Parade" magazine that came in the paper this week. It was titled: Better Ways To Go Green, and talked about how people are trying to be "greener", and the ways that are actually better for them than the current trends. (Yes, I believe many of them are trendy!)

Firstly, it says that using sturdy, reusable totes are better for the environment than paper or plastic bags at the grocery store. Ha! I purchased about 5 of these reusable bags in a moment of sheer "green-ness" a few months ago! Now if I can just remember to get them out of the trunk and take them in the store when I go. I only remember after I have a whole cartfull of stuff and am in too big of a hurry to run back to my car to the the dang things!

Redecorating in eco-friendly furniture vs. refurbishing old furniture: Ha! again!!! The article says that refurbishing is "greener".I haven't purchased a new couch for 10+ years!!!! I have recovered it several times, and recently made some very stylish new pillows which look quite professional, I must say! (do I still get green points even though I tossed the old polyester filled pillows into the garbage which will go to the landfill? At least I didn't burn them, releasing toxic polyester fumes into the atmosphere causing the ozone layer to suddenly rupture and cook us all like turkeys in our own homes!)

Driving a Hybrid SUV vs. a smaller hybrid, or driving less: Well, we are already green there- we don't even own an SUV! And, although we don't own a hybrid of any kind, we are contemplating removing the floor of my husband's old Nissan Sentra and driving it "Flintstones" style. It should surely save on gas, although we'd need to replace the rubber soles of our shoes much more often, causing the deforestation of many rubber trees in foreign lands- but it's not like we'll ever go there and fill up their dumps with our stuff, either! Seem like a fair trade to me!

And finally, using Bamboo clothing vs. "Classic, timeless pieces made from quality fabrics" (as they put it): Well, I must say, I feel a bit pridefull in saying that I am TOTALLY green in this area! I've never even seen an article of bamboo clothing! It doesn't sound very appealing to me! I have a pair of polyester pants that I've owned for over 10 years now, and they are indestructable, which means I will probably be wearing them until I am too old to get my leg up into them anymore. Of course, it also means they won't biodegrade, but I can just pass them down generation to generation and everyone can experience the pleasure of my polyester pants! "Erin's last will and testiment: I hereby bequeath my black polyester pants to _________". Now, if passing on a legacy like that isn't green, than I don't wanna be green!!!!

Free Apron!!!!!!

A great blogger, Scribbit, is giving away- as in FOR FREE- one of my cute aprons! This one, actually!


Go to her site and enter by Monday! Who doesn't like getting free stuff, right?

Well.... what are you waiting for???? Go NOW!!!!!

The Doctor is NOT in......

I think I have a sign on my head that only seriously screwed up people can read that says:

"Please, come to me with all your problems and dirty laundry and spill your guts and interrupt me at all hours so I can sit and listen to all your problems and tell you you need to repent and change your life".

Ok, maybe it's not that long, maybe just "The Doctor Is In".

Anyway, I am emotionally and physically drained because my sign appears to be flashing neon right now. I just want to curl up in my bed and shut out the world around me. I want to yell out: "I can't fix your problems, ok? I can only tell you to read your scriptures, attend church, pay your tithing, pray, and don't do obviously stupid things!" But, this certain person doesn't read this blog, and never will. *sigh*

I think I'll put up a real sign that says "The Doctor is having a nervous breakdown. Please find somewhere else to be disfunctional."

Taxes.......arrreggggghhhhhaaaaaaaa!!!!!!

A few months ago, my sweet hubby sat down one morning and actually started doing the taxes. I think I even blogged about it. I was so amazed that he didn't put it off until the last minute! Every year, on April 13th, tensions in our home run high. Blood pressure rises and sentences get short and clipped. I was soooo happy it was going to be totally different this year!!!! Not so.....

He dabbled in them every now and then. I'll give him that. But, last night, when he got home from work, I said, "Now, you KNOW you can't have any fun tonight until taxes are DONE!" He rolled his eyes, and sat down at the computer with a moan.

It's funny how adults can quickly revert to being children when things like taxes, or college homework, or even weeding the garden come up. We start to pout, hang our head, our lower lip juts out. We start to find little things that need to be done.... cleaning lint out of the belly button, plucking frayed bristles from our tooth brush.... anything, to avoid doing the one thing that needs to be done!

I made a chocolate cake to give hubby some incentive to do the taxes. I told him he couldn't have any until the taxes were all done. Out goes the lower lip. After about an hour, I sensed he needed some major pick-me-up so I went ahead and brought in the large piece of warm cake with a cold glass of milk. Happily he consumed it, then went back to working, (with a little prompting). After a few "Merritt.... you can't watch t.v. right now..... Merritt, what are you supposed to be doing right now?.... Merritt...... your zits can wait...." All in all, I didn't have to do as much proding as I thought. Maybe this year was better!

I'm happy to say, the taxes were finally finished just before 10pm.... a record, I think. I will get them in the mail today. I did the state taxes this morning... it's the least I can do to contribute! Actually, Merritt says he wants to look over my work to make sure he understands how the state taxes work, but I know it's to make sure I did them right! I think I'll go eat a piece of cake, myself. Tax time is hard!

Blessing Dress Bliss!

I finished the blessing dress for my neice, Aurora, today. It took me a long time, but I am pleased with the finished product! I can't wait to see her in it! Here are lots of pictures of it!
Here is the front with the coat done up This is a close-up of the coat

Here is the dress

This is a close-up of the dress bow-

-And the hat and booties

and finally the back of the coat-

Is that your child stuck to the wall?

Reading a friend's blog made me think about something. I rarely like other people's kids. Let me clarify- I rarely like tending other people's kids. While growing up, I didn't do a lot of babysitting. I have to say it's something I really haven't felt the loss of in my adult life. I often wondered at what kind of mother I'd be, having not had much experience in the kid-watching arena. Sure, I knew how to change a diaper, feed a kid, wipe their nose, etc. But wasn't sure if I'd even LIKE my kid. I don't seem to have much patience for other people's kids.

You see, other people's kids have perpetually runny noses, extremely dirty faces, smell funny, whine a lot, have sticky hands with fuzz between the fingers, full, saggy diapers, and don't know they're not supposed put their dirty hands all over my walls... you get the idea. When I worked in the nursery at churh, I really saw what other people's kids can be like. Some people don't think to smell their kid's diaper before they drop them off for you to handle. Some people don't see the cheerios stuck to their kid's head! How is that? Some people don't care that their child cannot breathe because their left nostril is entirely plugged up with crusty gunk! Come on, people! Take some pride in your child's appearance!


Ok, so before you start thinking, "How can she not like MY sweet kids?" I have to say, that when a kid is clean, and happy, and diaper-changed, I am easy to please! Give me a cuddly kid without a sucker or soggy cracker in his hand any day! I'm sure you all feel the same way about other people's kids- come on--- admit it! So, I'm sure I've scared you all away from ever having me tend your little ones. Hey, I don't mind watching them now and then! Really! Just wash em up, change their diaper, load em up with Benedryl- oops, did I say that out loud? No, really. Most of the people I associate with have really cute kids. Really! Because they take pride in their children, and themselves! It's the ones that don't that ruin it for the rest of us!

Wow. Kind of a snotty post, huh? Well, we can't always be sunshine and daisies, right?