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Friday, February 20, 2009

Women need women

I never thought I'd be one to say this, but I am glad for the company of women in my life. Not just my mom and sister, who are my best friends in the world, and whom I know I could never do without. I am talking about women in my church, or my neighborhood who edify my life and give me other things to think about, new ways of looking at things, and who lift me up.

Last Sunday I was able to listen to 4 women in my church talk about their lives and their testimonies of the gospel, and how it has brought them strength in their lives. It was fascinating to me to hear the many different stories of their trials and struggles. It helped me to see that there is so much more to a person that we don't see beneath the surface, and though it may be easy for us to judge someone, there is so much more to the story.

I was strengthened in my own life by listening to these women. One talked about how she had never wanted to have children, but finally came to the realization that it was the most important thing she could do in her life- more than career, or money, or prestige- anything. I really admire her choice,and adore her little boy! I, too, struggled with having a career. I wanted to be an opera singer and travel all over performing. I got married and had a kid, instead. I know that leaving my family to persue my dreams of singing isn't what is the best thing- that I need to be here for my family and teach the gospel and good values in my home. I can't do that if I'm singing in some grand opera house across the country, or spending all my time at rehearsals. It helped to remind me that, while my job as a mom and housewife isn't glamourous or financially profitable, I am making the right choice, and my son will be better for it.

Today I was able to eat breakfast with another good friend. She is several years older than me, but I feel a connection to her, and we always have so much to talk about when we get together. I am fascinated with her passion for life and all things beautiful. Her maturity teaches me and helps me with things I may be struggling with. I am glad I have allowed myself to open up to her and let her into my life.

I am one to close off and not let people inside. I don't want to be misjudged, or misunderstood by people, as so often has been the case, so it is just easier to keep people at a distance. However, I am learning that I can miss out on a lot of growth if I do this. I've already missed out on many friendships I should have nurtured through the years for fear of being hurt. I will try harder to get to know these women in my life better. They may only be in my life for a short time, or maybe a friendship can last for years, but I won't know if I don't try.


Lauren said...

I have been thinking about this today. While I was out doing my visiting teaching, I couldn't help but notice how great these sisters are that I visit, and how I can't seem to let myself become a real friend to them. Of course I think they are wonderful, and I would love to spend more time with them, but I just have a hard time taking that step to open myself up to them! It was really an eye opener today as we were leaving our last appointment, and the sister we were visiting turned to my companion and told her to call her so they could do something fun this weekend. What am I, chopped livah?! They are in the RS presidency together, so I can see why they would be closer, but I think I'm a pretty neat person too! Maybe they just see the dark circles and vacant expression and assume I am just too tired to have any fun :).

Jen said...

Amen sister!

heather said...

Thanks for that post. I too close off because I have been hurt and misjudged so many times. Women definitely need women and sometimes the Lord sends people into your life that you would never have met otherwise.

Andrea said...

I felt so intimidated when I saw who was asked to speak on a similar topic. I really wished that I could have stayed and heard THEIR words of wisdom. Somedays life just makes me feel out of my league.