Life's Not Fair

I hate... hate... HATE it when kids whine and say "It's NOT FAIR!!!!" That just makes me lose my mind! Having only 1 child, I really don't hear it much, which is probably why I still have a child at all! I think having to compete with siblings causes you to find out the cold, hard, truth that life isn't fair all too soon.

When I was little, my Dad didn't cater to that kind of whining, either. If one of us kids would say "Hey... how come SHE got more than Me?????" He would simply reply, "Because I love her more." That would pretty much put a stop to the whining. I tend to take the same approach. Whenever Eason says "Mom, that's not fair!" I just say, "Well, I'm just a mean mom!" He immediately replies that, no, I am a really nice mom... reverse psychology has always worked on him!

However, refusing to give in to the whining doesn't change the fact that, yes, life is really NOT fair! Sometimes little things really get to me and I find myself wanting to cry out "NOT FAIR!!!" although I know it will accomplish nothing. For example, Oreos. I love the yummy chocolatey cookies... HATE the cream filling. They sell double stuff Oreos, regular stuff, strawberry stuff, mint stuff..... it goes on and on... but do they sell NO stuff???? Absolutely NOT! I have to purchase the regular stuff kind and sit with a knife and a plate and scrape the yucky pastey filling off of each and every one! It just isn't fair!

I won't even go into how mad it makes me when I have stood in line at the store waiting and waiting, only to find the checker decides to take a break just as I get up there. Or showing up early to a movie, getting the perfect seat and then having late comers constantly squeezing past you and sticking their rear ends in your face as they shuffle to their seats because they didn't get their early, all the while talking out loudly to their friends, or worse, on their cell phone!!!

Of Course, there's always those incidents at work where someone who hasn't been there as long as you, and does less work than you, has made buddy- buddy friends with your manager and finds themselves catapulted up to management over you! Luckily, the position I'm in now prevents anyone from surpassing my ranking as
1st Lady of the House. But I hear about it from Merritt and it makes my blood boil! I compose nasty emails in my sleep... I really have Merritt nervous sometimes! hee hee hee!

I'm stewing over some other stuff that's just not fair right now. I won't get into it, but it's NOT FAIR!!!! However, there's nothing I can do about it so I'll just go scrape some filling out of Oreos and sulk.

Step into my time machine!!!!

I think some part of me has never really grown up. (Yes, I know you all know this! But admitting it is the first step, right?) There are some things I wish were still around now that I loved as a child. Mainly T.V. shows. (Now I am about to show how old I am as most of you probably won't have a clue what I'm talking about, but you'll get a good history lesson any way.)

I can't watch a movie with Morgan Freeman without thinking about "The Electric Company". Do any of you remember this show??? Many of you probably weren't even a twinkle in your parent's eyes when it was on, sadly. Your lives would be better had you been able to grow up watching this:


My husband's favorite movie is "The Matrix", and it took me about 20 times of watching it before I had a clue as to what it was about. However, one of the main characters in it I recognized right away as "Cowboy Curtis" from "Pee Wee's Playhouse"! Everytime I see the Matrix now, I say, "Look! It's Cowboy Curtis!" I just can't take him seriously now!


And who didn't hurry and do their Saturday chores so they could watch "Fat Albert and the Cosby Kids"???? Anyone???? Anyone????? Well, I did! I was obsessed with all things Bell Bottom.... it's true.


And finally, you can't function as a real, well-rounded human being if you haven't been exposed to the allure of those darling little blue people "The Smurfs". Here is a full episode, so gather the kids around, pop some popcorn, and enjoy!

Of course, I couldn't finish this blog without mentioning my absolute favorite shows growing up. Every Saturday night I would make my Grandpa stop watching "TJ Hooker" so I could turn on "Love Boat" and "Fantasy Island". ( I only put the Fantasy Island clip here, you all should know the Love Boat song!)


*sigh* Yes, those days are gone.... it's true. But thanks to the internet, we can enjoy them over and over and over and over in our adulthood. (Ok, Merritt! I'll stop watching Fantasy Island clips and feed you and Eason. Ok, and do the laundry piled up to the ceiling..... yes, and I'll pay the bills.......) I wish I was a kid again!!!! Calgon... take me away!!!!!

Misunderstood..... what else is new?

Ok, ok, ok!!!! I take this moment to officially state that I did not intend my previous post as a bash on anyone I know!!!! If you are one of the few who took it personally, just don't, ok? I was spewing forth random thoughts from my head.. it gets a little crowded in there... lots of voices all competing with eachother.
Sometimes I have to remind myself out loud (or in writing) what is really important. Especially when I've returned from a trip to Ikea where I fantasized about all the neat furniture and storage items I could purchase if I wasn't spending all my money to go to Europe. (I did, however, come home with a niffty little t.v. tray for my bed.)

I guess sometimes I need to remind myself that I am just as good as the next person... even if I live on Drug Dealer Way. Hey, at least I know if I ever pick up the habit, I'll only have to go as far as my front sidewalk to get the goods!

So, is everything ok again? Is your blood pressure going down, now? You can stop sending me nasty emails, ok? I think you're great! Yep, I do! Oh... gotta go, the voices in my head are urging me to go eat chocolate!

Spring has sprung.... sort of!

Arrrrrrrrrrggggggg!!!!! I was getting all excited for spring, and I even have 2 daffodills in bloom, but what do I wake up to this morning?????


My poor little flower is cold and shivering!!!!


Oh, well, yesterday I took Eason to the Zoo. I hadn't been since last fall, and we only got to be there for an hour, and it was getting cold, but it was still fun! This little monkey was sooo cute!



This little Orange Tamarind had just had twin babies the day before. The picture is hard to tell, but the orange lump on the bigger monkey's back is the new little baby clinging for it's life!!!!





And finally, two funny monkeys!!!!



We got a family pass, so we can go every Friday after school if we want! I am very excited!!!! I guess I'll just pass the drudgery of this snowy day sewing... and baking cookies!!!!

When is Enough Enough????

I have been thinking a lot lately about "stuff". You know, the accumulation of stuff, the desire for more stuff, the need to get rid of stuff to make room for the compulsion to keep buying stuff. Actually, I've really been thinking about the really BIG stuff, like large appliances, homes, cars, etc. And at what cost do we get these things?

When we bought our little home, it was really a miracle, and a huge blessing. We had just had a baby and needed to move out of where we had been living. I happened to drive by our house while on the way to look at another home. Merritt saw the sign and wanted to stop, so we did. I immediately knew it was tooooo small, but I also knew almost immediately it was the home we would be buying. We needed the income from the basement apartment so I could stay home with Eason.

It hasn't been ideal.... no storage- my clothes are in the hallway and in Eason's bedroom, a kitchen meant for a microwaving bachelor- not a gourmet cook, and a less than sound-proof basement- I still have fears the basement renters can hear EVERYTHING! But is has allowed me to be a stay-at-home mom which is what I am supposed to be doing.

It's hard to watch other young couples move "up" to bigger, nicer homes in more desireable areas while we stay put. It's hard to see others getting their 2, 3, and 4 kids while I only have my 1 (who I absolutely adore and wouldn't trade for the entire world!) But I am also blessed with a wise husband who knows that saving money for the future and not getting too much house for our needs is more important. He has worked so hard to put money away for our emergency fund, and to ensure that I can stay home with Eason.

Sometimes I think, well, we COULD afford to move, and then I'd have lots more room. But we would be sacrificing some future security. We wouldn't be able to put as much money away. I have also sometimes dreamed of getting a job and having a "real" life again. I think maybe all stay-at-home moms feel this way sometimes. But then I am reminded of the importance of raising my son and being there for him in an ever-increasing, pressure ridden, evil influenced world. I see how important it is for me to be home when he gets home and discuss with him the things of the day, and choices he's made. I couldn't leave that teaching up to some day care, or neighbor, just so I can have a bigger kitchen and a closet!

My heart hurts when I see people who feel they need a BIG house or nicer cars, and get it at the expense of their children. I see how times are getting harder, how jobs are no longer very secure. The days are gone when a man will choose a career and stay with a company for 40 years and then retire. People are losing their homes because they wanted "more" than they could really afford. People are losing their children because they put "things" at greater importance. The days will soon come when we will need to rely on the money we've set aside, and the food we've stored up. We have been warned about being prepared. The prophets haven't said, "Make sure you have a huge house for the last days", they've said time and again that we need to be financially prepared, and have food storage. I'm still working on the food storage bit, and still working on the financially prepared part, too. I know I could do better.

I may be cramped, and my living room turned into my sewing room, but I am glad for a wise husband, and a sweet little boy, and a roof over my head. I am glad for what I have. Would I like to move? Of course! But I know that if I raise my family right, we will be blessed no matter where we live. For now, I am willing to be where the Lord wants me to be. It may not always be easy, but I will try my best to make it work!

The Funeral Singer..... a new movie!

Old people tend to scare me. It's true. Now, before you start thinking I'm heartless and cruel, let me explain. I grew up singing in rest homes. My mom would drag me to endless care centers to sing to the elderly and debilitated. I remember as a small child being hit with the wall of stench as I entered the sliding glass doors. The strong smell of urine and lasagna still lingers in my nostrils 28 years later. I still cannot eat lasagna if I haven't prepared it myself. I remember walking down the halls to the meeting place and seeing all the old people laying in their beds crying out for help, or yelling at me to get out and leave them alone. It was a very traumatic experience for me. I remember their cold, scratchy, wrinkled hands grabbing my arms and their stale, old person breath too close to my little face. Yes, these images are forever engraved in my brain. So,I think it's understandable why I may be a bit leary of the elderly. When I was older, I still got roped into singing at these places a lot. Once, my then boyfriend (now hubby) and I sang on Christmas morning at a rest home. This old lady sat in the corner eating her non-descript food mumbling and grumbling. When my husband's dad got up and started yodeling, she burst out and said "Well, that's about enough to kill a person!" It was the most amusing Christmas I've ever experienced, at any rate!

I have also had to experience singing at the funerals of many of these very same elderly. I think I've learned to become detached when I attend funerals, partly because I've known so many of the people. I've sung at too many to even count. I had a little organ when I was a little girl, and would pretend to play funeral songs. Yes, that is a little morbid! Strangely, though, I really enjoy singing at funerals. Maybe it's because I don't have to face the person who's died, I don't know. But I really love the spirit that floats in the air at funerals. The strong smell of beautiful flower arrangements and cooking ham and funeral potatoes makes me feel all warm and fuzzy. I even make ham and funeral potatoes at home sometimes when I want comfort food! I love that people cry every time I sing... of course, it's because their emotions are close to the surface, but it's still nice. (I feel very uncomfortable when they compliment my singing, though, so I usually try to duck out quickly to avoid talking to people.) Most of all, I love that I can help bring peace and comfort to those who are grieving, and maybe express in music what they can't find the words to say.


Now, in my current ward (church), I have many elderly acquaintences, and I love them all. Maybe I don't feel so uncomfortable around them because they are upright and self-sufficient. Maybe it's because they aren't pleading for help or yelling at me. But they have all asked that I sing at their funerals when they pass on. I suddenly get uncomfortable, and find myself backing away a bit. I can smell the acrid stench again of lasagna and urine, and suddenly the wrinkles on their hands become more apparent. I, of course, consent to sing for them, but inside I am thinking "Am I consigned to do this for the rest of my life?" Then I'm brought back to reality and see they are such kind people, and it may bring them comfort to know they have at least part of their funeral planned!

In the end, though, I am glad to have the chance to sing at funerals, even if I didn't know the deceased. I still shy away from rest homes and care centers, though. I get a very panicked feeling when I go to those places. I'd rather sing for the dead at funerals. Is that strange? I feel like the reverse of "The Wedding Singer".... they should make a movie about me, "The Funeral Singer". However, I don't think it would be very interesting. A lot of crying, and funeral potatoes, and I probably wouldn't even stick around for the end!

Birthday Haiku

Ok, I am sure you all can attest that I can be a bit strange. Furthermore, I am sure you can all agree that my husband can be pretty strange, too. I guess that's why we get along so well.

We write haikus to eachother. I started it. In fact, I think I surprised my hubby with my haiku writing prowess. I surprise myself at times. The beauty that flows from my fingertips is awe-inspiring, and I am often catapulted from my every-day normalcy to an alternate existence where...... ok, enough of that.

Today is my hubby's birthday, so to him I write this haiku.

eh...hem......

Arrival
Squeezing, pushing, wet...
Ripped from quitness and warmth
Welcome to the world

Happy birthday, sweetie!!!! I love you!!!!

It's a good thing you can't send them back sometimes!

"Mom, are you ever going to do anything else but sew the rest of your life?"

(Eason says to me in the car the other day as I dragged him to the fabric store for the 15th time this week)

"Well, I do lots of different things. But right now, I really like making aprons. It gives me satisfaction... a purpose in life. And I'd like to make a little bit of money to have for things I want to do."

"Mom....... your purpose is to make me and Daddy dinner and do the dishes! You don't need to do anything else! Besides, we have enough money, so you should just stop making aprons."
*********************************************************************************

This morning we were watching my little 11 month old nephew. Eason says:

"Mom, do you wish we had a little baby?"

"Yeah, I do. It's sure fun to have a cute little baby around to play with, huh? But I'm glad I got to have at least one cute baby!"

"Yeah, me too........ But, it's too bad you never got your figure back!"

Cookies of the Devil

My friend posted about Girl Scout cookies on her blog. I am filled with mixed emotions about these little things:

Warm Fuzzies- because everyone loves G.S. cookies, right? They are like little boxes sent from Heaven to make our dreary lives a little sweeter.

Irritation- because the little G.S. who usually comes around every year to sell me my cookies didn't come this year. Why not? Have I not been a faithful consumer? Have I not greeted you with frantic hugs and kisses each time you've brought my order? Have I not send you flowers and singing telegrams weekly to remind you of how much I adore you? Have I not respected the restraining order you placed against me for harrassing you about when the next shipment of cookies would be coming? Where are you????????

Fear- Will I be able to control myself this year? Will I be able to stop at only 1 Samoa.... place the uneaten portion of Thin Mints gently back into the cupboard and walk away? Avoid the embarrasment of waking up on the bathroom floor covered in chocolate fudge smears and brown cookie crumbs with only a hazy memory of a blissful moment in the bedroom closet with just me and my box of Thin Mints?


Panic- Will I make it to the store in time to catch the Girl Scouts with their table all set up before they sell out of my desperately needed "FIX" of Samoas and Thin Mints? Will my marriage survive another year of "How many Thin Mints have YOU eaten today?" and "I thought I bought 3 boxes, but there's only one left". Or, "It's me or this box of cookies... you can't have us both".

However, at the end of the day, I accept that the inner struggle is over before it's even begun. It's good to know one's self, and I know that I will not be able to resist getting a few boxes as I leave the grocery store. I know I will not even sniff the contents of the first 2 boxes as my husband inhales them in less than a minute. I know I will eat way too many Samoas, and vow that I will NEVER buy them again.... until next year. I know myself. And so, finally, I am filled with the last emotion:

Peace- because G.S. cookies will always be around. People can't live without them, though they may try. Even people who have never seen or heard of them them somehow know they are around... and have the hope that someday they will find that inner peace that comes after you've recklessly eaten a whole roll of Thin Mints, followed by a cold glass of milk. They are a staple of huminity, proof that we are sentient beings, capable of greatness.

And so, I say, be they morsels of goodness or cookies of the devil, I will always look forward to Girl Scout cookie season, and the flood of emotions it brings.
Thank you Girl Scouts of America!!!!!!!

My Titanic Didn't Sink

I admit it, I am somewhat dillusional. As my mom often says, "I only remember the good things". I think I have taken after her in this, I only like to think of the good things. Worse yet, I even twist and change things in my head to make them good.
Especially with movies or books. If a movie ends badly, I will turn it off, and imagine a totally different ending in my head, this is what allows me to sleep at night. I did this with the movie "Titanic" . I watch the beginning to where they end up on the front of the boat, the "King of the World" part, and then I just turn it off. I like to pretend they all made it to America, alive, and lived happily ever after. People say, "Have you seen Titanic?" and I say, "Oh, Ya, I loved the ending!" I get strange looks, but at least I'm not feeling sad about the whole thing like everyone else!

"Fiddler on the Roof" is another one I have to change. It is too heart breaking to see this good family suffering so. The father means well, but hurts his youngest daughter because he has to put his foot down. And then his family has to pick up and leave their village..... oh, it's too sad to recant. I like to imagine they all move to Austria where they become the "Von Trap family singers" and sing their way down the Rein... until the Germans come to kick them out, and then I pretend they sing so well that the Germans decide they were in the wrong and quit the war! See, I'm sick in the head!

I like to think of myself as "positively challenged", meaning that I am so inclined to see the good in things that it is very difficult for me to see the reality. Is that so wrong? What if everyone were this way? Would it really be so bad to have everyone read Period Romance novels, watching the "Jane Austen" channel 24/7, and being polite to each other? I like to think that everyone secretly does these things already! This thinking, did however get me into some trouble when I'd break up with a boyfriend. Sometimes I'd try to pretend it didn't happen and then there'd be the whole Restraining Order thing, you know how it can get. (just kidding! NO, really, I'm not being dillusional, I really am just kidding about this!)

With that said, I"d better shew these chirping, rhyming birds out of my bedroom after they finish helping me get dressed, so I can go do the dishes with my friends the mice... Jack, and Gus-Gus. For, someday my prince will come and he'll carry me off on his steed to Hawaii for an extended vacation eating fresh pineapple and having coconut milk rubbed all over my body with palm fronds while watching the pink and blue sunset aboard my luxury liner the "Elizabeth Bennett". Farewell, all!

Saucy Frocks appeal to animals everywhere!

Ya, so there is no compliment like when you find out animals love your aprons! A friend had someone send her this picture of her cat loving my apron online! It's great! No, I don't make them in kitty sizes. Sorry.

For all you Star Wars fans!

an ABC quiz about me

A - Attached or single: Attached- at both hips!

B - Best friends - Merritt, Eason, Lauren, Mom

C-Cake or Pie: Chocolate cake, Coconut Cream Pie

D- Day of Choice: Friday, because Eason gets off school early, and we have "Family Movie Night" where we pull out the couch bed and pop popcorn and watch cheesey old Disney movies, and eat pizza, and stay up late!

E- Essential Items: Lipstick, perfume, sewing machine and serger, INTERNET and computer!

F- Favorite Color: RED!!!

G- Gummi Bears or Worms: Neither, I don't like candy except chocolate.

H- Hometown: Salt Lake City, UT

I -Indulgence(s): Girly period romance movies and novels, Sushi

J- January or July: Neither! I hate both! Give me April or October!!!!!!

K-Kids: 3- Merritt, Eason, and Nappy

L-Life is incomplete without: My husband, son, family, oxygen

M- Marriage Date: Oct.22, 1999 (Yes, we sang "Tonight We're Gonna Party Like It's 1999" on our wedding day! If you don't know that song, you're too young!)

N- Number of Siblings: 2 - Cory (2 years older), Lauren (3 years younger), 10 step siblings, 8 ex-step siblings

O- Oranges or Apples: Apples with cheese and crackers

P- Phobias or Fears: afraid of dark basements and a green hand under my bed!

Q- Quote(s): I know it isn't a real quote, but it's my favorite: "It's better to be rich and healthy than poor and sick!

R- Reason To Smile: My husband and son are the best in the whole world! My business is taking off faster then I ever imagined

S- Season: Fall- it's when I got married and I love the fresh crisp smell in the air, and the anticipation of the coming holidays!

T- Tag Six: Whoever wants to post, just let me know so I can snoop!

U- Unknown Fact About Me: I wish I could sing in a bluegrass group, but my husband would banish me from the house

V- Vegetarian or Oppressor of Animal: Dead Cow smothered in Garlic and olive oil, medium rare! Mmmmmmmm!!!! I LOVE vegetables, though!

W- Worst Habit: I never wear shoes, even when I go outside. My feet get so thrashed. Merritt calls me a little urchin! And, Yes, Eason hates wearing shoes now, too.

X- X-Rays or Ultrasounds: What kind of a question is this? I say X-Ray vision!!!!!

Y- Your Favorite Foods: Anything Japanese, Chicken Piccata, canned spinach straight from the can ( I know, weird!), Pasta, Lucky Charms cereal

Z-Zodiac: Taurus

Free Apron Give Away!!!!

Hey everyone,
My friend is giving away one of my aprons on her blog as a promotion for my site! She gets a lot of traffic every day, so it's a great boost for me! You can go to Loraleesluneytunes and read all about how to enter. (Just ignore the pictures of us, though. I don't know what she was thinking posting those horrid things!) It is for your choice of aprons on my site, so how much better can it get! The contest ends Friday, though, so hurry up!

Who doesn't like free stuff?????

Country Garden apron

I just thought I'd post a picture of my latest apron! This is one of my favorites, I think.

At least my bottom was happy!

Yesterday we spent the entire Sacrament Meeting out in the foyer on the soft couch. I have to say, I think more people would come to church if they all had soft couches to sit on. I mean, people fall asleep anyway, so why not let those who are staying awake had more comfortable bottoms as well?

Why were we out in the foyer, you ask? We arrived late and Sacrament was just starting, and we didn't want to be disruptive. Usually when this happens we just go back and sit in the chapel when the sacrament is over. However, yesterday, I was so comfortable, and having a bad hair day, and not feeling well, so I decided we would just stay out in the foyer. Where was the voice of my mother telling me to go sit on the 2nd row and be a good girl? I was too comfortable and lazy to listen! (Sorry Mom!) However, we were able to listen quite reverently, Eason included, for most of the testimonies. I think it actually made me listen more because I was trying to figure out who was speaking! And then, when the other ward let out, it was like an exercise in listening to the Holy Ghost, because we could hardly hear the speakers over the noise of the people around us. And then when the guy with the screaming baby couldn't help her quite down, it was also an exercise in patience and perserverance. So, you see, sitting in the foyer is going to help us have a great Family Home Evening tonight! And, our bottoms will be that much happier today because of it!

Ok, well, sometimes isn't it enough to say we went to church at all? Don't you ever have those days?