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Friday, August 28, 2009

Ugh..... then some soul searching

I'm exhausted, and its friday.

Its been a busy week- school starting, PTA planning, tomato canning, zuchini bread making, salsa canning, floor mopping, parent-teacher conferencing, dentist going, cavity finding, Avon selling.....sheesh!

I am NOT superwoman, nor shall I EVER be... EVER!

I've been feeling discouraged about that today, how some women can juggle a million things and still be vibrant and vivacious. I wish I could be like that. Oh, I can put on a happy face and perk up for company, but you don't see the closets stuffed with the dirty laundry I didn't have a chance to get to.

I've decided, however, that I can only be who I am. I can wish I were taller, thinner, naturally blonder, wittier, more organized-er, but no matter what I do, there are things that will inherantly always be me. I can put on heels, but I'll always be 5'3". I can dye my hair, but I'll always have those sneaking grays lurking. I can watch Audrey Hepburn movies 'til the cows come home and wish I was that elegant, that refined, but I really am limited by nature. I am who I am. All I can do is be the best "me" that I can.

I used to love it when I'd catch a deep chest cold. My voice would get deeper, more sultry. I loved that! I always wanted a deep sexy voice I could drip all over people while wearing a curve-hugging red dress. I was born with a high soprano voice- pure and simple fact. I can't go around licking doorknobs and hoping I'll catch a cold so I can be the sultry one again. Nope- I'm born to be a soprano. But that's not so bad.

So, I can feel sorry for myself, or I can say "This is who I am- take it or leave it." One person took it, and he's a fabulous husband- so patient and loving, and he makes me laugh. He loves me for who I am, and I think he knows who that is better than I do sometimes. He reminds me that I am all he needs, or wants, and that I am enough.

I'm glad for that- to be "enough". Short, mood hair, chipped nail polish, disorganized, speak- before- I- think, little me.

Today, I am enough- imperfections and all.

4 comments:

Jen said...

I think you might be the only person on earth who wouldn't categorize you as supermom! :) I mean, truly, the fact that you are even wearing nail polish amidst all of that is astounding - chipped or not! You are pretty darn awesome!

Whit said...

I think you are amazing!! And I am serious about you going onto America's got talent. I had a neighbor come over today and assist me with canning green beans. She LOVED the apron you made. I love it too! You are amazing!

Jess said...

Here Here!! Merrit's no fool...you are great.

Andrea said...

But if you already did all of that, you are super mom. I wouldn't even know where to start. And my nail polish is chipped.