Dear Car Change Thief (Heretofore known as CT),
I do not begrudge you my change. In fact, if you had come to my door and said "I am going to steal the change out of your car, but I'm giving you the chance to just give it to me if you'd rather" I would probably have given it to you. I do, however, disapprove your chosen method of getting it. Although, I do appreciate you leaving my cd's this time. You probably learned from the last pillaging that my cd's are not your usual "popular" music. I imagine most petty thiefs don't usually listen to opera divas, obscure musicals, and bluegrass , but that's just a guess. So, thank you for leaving the cd's. Next time, however, would you mind gently removing them instead of tossing them all over the car? My "Wicked" cd got a nasty scratch on it, which I sincerely hope is not on "Defying Gravity" because that will make me even more resentful.
I understand your need to support your drug habit, although I do think rummaging through people's cars at night collecting spare change seems a bit counter-productive. Wouldn't a part-time job pay more per hour? Oh, but you must have been after my collection of Conference Center parking tokens. That must be it. Well, I hope you use them. And then feel the need to repent and
BRING BACK MY CHANGE HOLDER!!!!!
Really? You had to actually remove the change holder and take it with you???? It wasn't valuable. In fact, the book that was sitting on the floor of the back seat, in the sack, with the receipt still in it was worth at least $10.65. You could have just taken that and returned it for cash! But, no... you had to have that black plastic change holder. Well, to each his own, I guess.
You do realize, however, that there most likely will not be a next time. See, I had actually learned my lesson from your last visit. I now lock my car doors every night! (My dear. sweet hubby, however, does not.) He is very sorry my change holder is gone, too. In fact, so sorry that he has been researching various ways to ensnare you. Just a warning: they seem a bit... uncomfortable... (Ok, I'll admit, he hasn't been doing anything of the sort. I have, however! I've lost my patience with you!!!!)
I am going to put up some lost posters today with a picture of my change holder. Surely someone will have seen it about. May your filthy conscience feel a tinge of regret and dig at your heart mercilessly until you return my change holder to me. That's all I want. My change holder.
You can keep the change.
I do not begrudge you my change. In fact, if you had come to my door and said "I am going to steal the change out of your car, but I'm giving you the chance to just give it to me if you'd rather" I would probably have given it to you. I do, however, disapprove your chosen method of getting it. Although, I do appreciate you leaving my cd's this time. You probably learned from the last pillaging that my cd's are not your usual "popular" music. I imagine most petty thiefs don't usually listen to opera divas, obscure musicals, and bluegrass , but that's just a guess. So, thank you for leaving the cd's. Next time, however, would you mind gently removing them instead of tossing them all over the car? My "Wicked" cd got a nasty scratch on it, which I sincerely hope is not on "Defying Gravity" because that will make me even more resentful.
I understand your need to support your drug habit, although I do think rummaging through people's cars at night collecting spare change seems a bit counter-productive. Wouldn't a part-time job pay more per hour? Oh, but you must have been after my collection of Conference Center parking tokens. That must be it. Well, I hope you use them. And then feel the need to repent and
BRING BACK MY CHANGE HOLDER!!!!!
Really? You had to actually remove the change holder and take it with you???? It wasn't valuable. In fact, the book that was sitting on the floor of the back seat, in the sack, with the receipt still in it was worth at least $10.65. You could have just taken that and returned it for cash! But, no... you had to have that black plastic change holder. Well, to each his own, I guess.
You do realize, however, that there most likely will not be a next time. See, I had actually learned my lesson from your last visit. I now lock my car doors every night! (My dear. sweet hubby, however, does not.) He is very sorry my change holder is gone, too. In fact, so sorry that he has been researching various ways to ensnare you. Just a warning: they seem a bit... uncomfortable... (Ok, I'll admit, he hasn't been doing anything of the sort. I have, however! I've lost my patience with you!!!!)
I am going to put up some lost posters today with a picture of my change holder. Surely someone will have seen it about. May your filthy conscience feel a tinge of regret and dig at your heart mercilessly until you return my change holder to me. That's all I want. My change holder.
You can keep the change.
2 comments:
Did this by chance happen on Sunday night? Someone rifeled through my car the same night, and although they made a mess they didn't take anything. They did leave a bag of dirty laundry in my car. Gross. Maybe if we work together we can come up with a trap.
WOW.... that is pretty bad... I'm so sorry about that. Nothing like having your car broken into to feel violated. I had someone break in once and steal a fake cubic zirconia ring... hope he thought he was getting the big bucks off of that!
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