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Thursday, February 11, 2010

The mysterious delivery

The other day I got a package delivered by the UPS guy.

My dog was barking madly at him as though his fluffy white meanness could scare off that big, scary brown truck. I know that bark, it usually means my new fabric order has arrived. But I hadn't placed a new fabric order.

Puzzled, I went to the door and found the package there. A cute little brown box, with my name on it!

It's not my birthday, I thought. It's not Christmas, or Valentine's (yet), or Easter, or my anniversary. Why am I getting a present all for me?

With eager anticipation I began opening the box. I paused for a moment remembering back in 2001 when people were afraid to open myserious packages in the mail for fear of anthrax contamination. Could it be anthrax? Or Mustard Gas? I shook the box, but it was way too heavy for that, unless the terrorists were hoping to unleash an amount of anthrax so large it could wipe out the entire state of Utah via little old me.

No. I laughed at that thought. I have no enemies! Giggling, I began opening the box again. The contents were hidden by bubble wrap and papers. I never read the packing papers, do you?

Suddenly, the treasure was revealed...almost. They were two round canisters. Hmmmm... maybe my first guess was accurate, I thought. I pulled up one of the canisters. My heart leapt, could it be two free canisters of my favorite Steven's gourmet hot chocolate? Oooo... I hoped it was mint truffle!!!

I was looking at the back label which gave me no hint as to its content. I rotated the can around and my heart sank. Was this a cruel joke? Why would someone send me this? Maybe I do have enemies after all.

The Similac company! Standing there holding those free "gifts" of baby formula I had to laugh with the irony. No. I do not need these... at all! Sadly, I put them back in the box and sat there a moment before closing it up and taking it across the street to the couple with the little baby. Here. You could use this more than I can. It doesn't make very good bread, I've tried it. No. I'm sure. We don't need it. You take it.

I trudged sadly back across the street to my baby-free home.

*sigh* Maybe someday.

I went to my computer and promptly ordered some fabric.


elliespen said...

Oh, cousin, I love you. It's like getting the email that another couple I know was having their miracle baby with my same due date two days after my miscarriage.

Here's praying for somedays.

Andrea said...

Hey, I want to hear about the ballet. I like the ballet, but some are zonkers. Swan Lake is a classic, but I've never seen it. I need a blunt-Erin review. Don't hold any punches.